Fred Trueman's Witty Quips

John Arlott, the poetic cricket commentator, raconteur and wine enthusiast from Hampshire, wrote that Trueman approached the wicket 'with the majestic rhythm that emerges as a surprise in the Spanish fighting bull'. Beginning at a steady pad, he gradually accelerated, hair flopping, until he completed his charge in an explosion of malevolent power.

Trueman rounded off this spectacle with histrionic gestures of despair, rage or triumph.

Arguably the finest fast bowler that England [and of course Yorkshire] has produced, Freddie Trueman's ability did not end there say Will and Guy. He was a splendid story teller and would regale audiences with his "cricketing tales".

Did You Know?Trueman played football for Lincoln City and turned down professional terms to concentrate on cricket.

Some might argue that many of his stories were apocryphal; others might remark that it matters not since the tales are fun and indeed funny. We hope you will enjoy the items we have chosen to share with our readers here.

FS Trueman's Fabulously Funny Cricketing Anecdotes 'Owzat?

Trueman bowls. Batsman is trapped plumb LBW. Trueman appeals. Not out.

Next ball. Trueman ever-so-slightly irritated. Trueman bowls. Audible snick, ball deflects and sails upward, caught behind. Trueman appeals. Not out.

Third ball. Trueman a little more irritated now. Trueman bowls. Through the gate, stumps spread-eagled, middle stump uprooted and cartwheeling. Trueman turns to the umpire and says with a wry smile, 'We nearly had him that time, didn't we?'

ReligionOn the tour of Australia in 1962-63, the Reverend David Sheppard dropped several catches.

'Kid yourself it's Sunday, Rev,' Trueman expostulated, 'and keep your hands together.'

Humour of the Self Deprecating Kind [unusual for Fred]The scene was an Ashes test with England fielding ..... 'and I went back to my mark and hurtled into the wicket, a rap on the pads, Howzat? One for none.

I went back to my mark and hurtled into the wicket and the bails were off, two for none.

Then in came the great Sir Don Bradman. I went back to my mark and hurtled into the wicket, the ball was in the air, a fantastic catch on the long on boundary, three for three hundred and seventy six.

HeadingleyOn one occasion, an opposition batsman walking through the gate onto the outfield was told, 'Don't bother shutting it. You'll be back soon.'

Versus Cambridge UniversityWhen a Cambridge University student FS Trueman had just bowled said, 'That was a very good ball, Mr Trueman', he responded allegedly with, 'Ay, 'twas wasted on thee.'

I'm Good!He enjoyed being told he was good, too, and along these lines a lovely tale told by Richard Hutton reads as follows: after Freddie had returned yet another of his many five-wicket performances. 'Well bowled, Fred,' he said. 'Outswingers, inswingers, bouncers, yorkers, you bowled the lot. Tell me, did you ever bowl a plain straight one?'

Quick as a flash came the reply, 'Aye, one. But it was so fast it went through him like a dose a salts and knocked all three down.'

An allegedly true story about Fred on tour in the West Indies
Apparently Fred, at a reception during a tour of The West Indies, approached an elegant woman and made a pass at her.

She allegedly replied, 'As a woman, Mr Trueman, I am extremely flattered. But, as the governor's wife. I am absolutely outraged!'